Loose Curls vs Tight Coils; the good and the ugly?

Pic: Esperanza Spalding

Let's talk natural hair. To be more specific, I am referring to afro textured hair that naturally grows from the heads of Africans. African hair comes in diverse beautiful textures; even my sister and I who share the same parents have different textures let alone Africans from different ethnic backgrounds. However, though our textures may vary, I think its safe to say that at face value a majority of Africans have melanin rich hair that coils and stands up. So why do we predominantly see a particular type of natural hair being pushed to the forefront. This idealised natural hair image happens to be the defined loose curls that succumbs to gravity i.e. hair that looks like you could be mixed, or more bluntly put, hair that is closely aligned with European curly hair. A hair type that does not commonly grow from the scalps of many Africans.

The natural hair movement, a movement that is seeing women of African descent liberate themselves from the European one size fits all standards of hair beauty and embark on a journey of re-discovery. For in many cases, these women received their first 'relaxers' at tender ages, a decision that was made for them, hence have never seen their hair let alone taken care of their hair in its raw state. Sadly however, a movement that should see us start to rekindle the love we should have always had for our hair, is allowing many women to obsess over the manipulation of their hair to help them fit into a new 'natural' standard of hair beauty. 

It is very apparent that we are sneaking our white beauty standards into the natural hair community and so that 'good hair/bad hair' concept is still rearing its ugly head. Texture discrimination, where the good natural hair is the one that has the silky look, soft loose curls that bounces as it falls, and baby hairs that lays for the Gods whilst the kinkier type 4 hair textures only gets a 'good hair' pass with the aid of twist/braid outs and some good strong holding gel. So amongst many you'll find the obsession with styling techniques that create the illusion of a more uniformed looser curl pattern; methods that elongate the hair and combats shrinkage because downward length is still a problematic important measure of good hair; and let us not forget protective styling because apparently there's an evil force out there that doesn't want black women's hair to grow 'white girl hair long' (this force is only against afro hair, of course) so we must 'protect' it. I'm still wondering why I've never heard an Asian girl say she's protective styling to grow her hair. Maybe our hair wasn't designed to fall and hit our waistlines? Maybe it was actually supposed grow out big into the sky rather than down towards the ground. I often wonder if we've actually moved away from the notion of our hair being 'unmanageable', which was a prominent justification for relaxers, to a self love washed up version of the very same notion when we perpetuate that natural hair in an afro state becomes unmanageable and therefore needs to be in stretched out styles to combat this, or that our hair is so fragile it struggles to grow the European kind of long so we must protect it. The fact that we have to go into great measures to get our hair to behave the way we want it to (i.e. more European like) then is it that there is something wrong with our hair for not cooperating or that there may be something wrong in the way we want it to behave? Why is it that we listen to and trust external forces but not our own bodies? Do you listen to and trust your body when it makes your stomach growl from hunger or when it makes your eyes heavy from fatigue? Then why not so when it makes your hair tightly coil and defy gravity? 

Pic: Alicia Keys

For black women thinking to transition or big chop, they get hit with a huge disappointment when they see their natural hair and find that it's nappy! It looks nothing like the beautiful natural hair they saved many pictures of throughout their journey. Like I did, they will spend a lot of time trying to master the perfect twist out that just somehow doesn't look like the Instagram/Youtube girl’s hair. Even when a twist out looked somewat like a success in the morning, by noon it would be frizzing up into a fro. So in my case, after numerous failed twist outs, I just resulted to pulling my hair back into a bun and told myself that I'd wear my hair out when it gets longer and starts to fall instead of stand. Imagine that, I was hiding my natural hair because I couldn’t manipulate it to look like the ‘good natural hair’. What was supposed to be me loving and ENJOYING my natural hair resulted in me hiding it because it didn't fit into a white washed natural hair standard of beauty. There is so much beauty in the freedom of letting our hair grow from scalp as it will but if we want to do a twist out today then that’s fine, if we want to do poetic justice braids tomorrow that’s fine too, heck if I want to wear a wig some days or straighten my hair that’s fine. What's not fine is the mindset that our hair must always look a certain type of way to be socially accepted. 

With all that said, I get why we think the way we think and therefore do the things we do. It is of no surprise that we still try to 'tame' our hair, make it easy for others to digest and not appear to be making some sort of political statement because going natural really wasn't me going for a 'black panther look'. It is of no surprise that for a job interview or meetings we feel more comfortable to have our pulled hair back to be taken more seriously...I was always subconsciously told that our hair isn't professional for the corporate world. It is of no surprise, though it saddens me, when my own mother tells me that no man will find me attractive with my afro hair and that I do not look presentable. How your mother viewed your hair, you viewed your hair...she was just regurgitating the views of her own mother and the various female influences in her upbringing. Falling victim to how my mother viewed my hair, and in affect her own hair, I found myself inheriting this mental disorder that plagues the thoughts of many Africans towards their hair. I guess when you hear something enough times, you start to believe it. I am now less ignorant to these negative thoughts that still likes to creep up on me from time to time, white supremacy is a disease we've all been deeply infected by which will require time and active measures to heal from and I say 'heal' because it is abuse, but I digress. 

Natural hair is not fairly appreciated. Looser curl patterns cannot be the sole representation of African hair nor can it be the standard of beautiful African hair when the most honest representation would in fact lend more to the indigenous tightly coiled texture that crowns the head and reaches up to the heavens.

Sexual liberation or sexual objectification?

I like that women want to be in control of their sexualities but surely it doesn't need to be seen in the form of booty hanging out of a leotard (no names..). Whatever happened with being a lady in the streets and a freak in the sheets?! It's sad to see women sell themselves short; as mere sexual appreciations of men. Surely it is not female liberation when it is causing women to become even more imprisoned by their beauty and their bodies.

Are women confusing sexual liberation with objectification? Are we not just re-asserting the very images that are used in our sexual oppression? There must be another way for women to reclaim control over their own bodies in a non contradictory manner...no?

You’re a nice guy but…

The ‘nice guy’ is a popular topic of discussion but I thought my take on it was required so here it is in one sentence: being the ‘nice guy’ doesn’t make you the right guy!

It’s as simple as that.

What makes a guy ‘right’ is totally subjective; ticking the ‘nice’ checkbox is certainly a right box to be ticking BUT it’s not the only box we want ticked off! And here, fellas, is why the ‘nice guy’ tends to finish last – he’s just too nice. In other words, he’s exceptional in the ‘nice’ department but scores poorly in other areas we value just as highly yet expects us to overlook it just because he’s a ‘nice guy’. Pssssh…I don’t have to want to be with you just because you’re nice, I think my friends are nice too! Sorry to burst your bubble but the ‘nice’ checkbox doesn’t overrule all; you need to be a nice guy with a whole lot of other things on my list (which I’ve managed to cut down *pats back*, time is ticking!). It’s like going to a phone shop and the sales guy tries to sell you a nice phone but you can't make or receive calls! It being a nice phone no longer has any weight if does not have the basics. Being nice does not overrule!

I felt the need to write this because the other day I witnessed the tragic death of a nice guy and it distresses me to know that nice decent guys think they have to front like they're bad guys to keep a woman interested – you think girls want guys who lie and make them cry? Now that’s just schuuupid! And there’s nothing more annoyingly frustrating than a guy who plays it ‘too cool’; like hello…any more laid back and you’ll be in bed all day! There’s nice and there’s too nice; nice that keeps her smiling all day and too nice that makes her want to throw up because that's all you are and too much of anything can make you sick!

An end needs to be put to cries about nice guys finishing last. Yeah nice guys with no ambition or goals finish last; nice guys with no jobs finish last; nice guys who are pushovers finish last; nice guys who are spineless and lack personality finish last; nice guys with no charm and no confidence finish last; nice guys who are bland and boring finish last; nice guys who wear socks with sandals or think wearing jeans tighter than mine is ok, finish last. You dig? Like really, do u honestly believe a woman would dismiss a Brad Pitt for being 'nice'?! You think if Bradley Cooper was calling/texting me 10 times a day wanting to meet up, surprising me with bouquets, throwing stones outside my window (err actually scrap that, that would creep me out), showing up at my office with a rose in his mouth and a love poem he wrote for me in his hands (a girl can dream)...you think I’d dismiss him as too nice? Of course I want a nice guy; I don’t want the show no emotion type of dude so I can forever be second guessing how he really feels about me, or the ‘bad boy’ who can’t stay on the right side of the law, or even worse, the man who will happily give me a black eye, you think I want an Ike or a C-Breezy?! Stop with this misconception that women only go for bad boys because if a woman is head over heels in love with a ‘bad boy’, chances are it’s not because he’s bad but because he has attributes that she values.

So what's my point? My point is this, when a guy is described as too nice, it generally means he's 'just nice' and not much else. It DOES NOT translate to 'he is absolutely mind-blowingly amazing but my dumbass is totally going to ignore that because...he's too nice'. If a woman genuinely likes a guy, damn right she wants him to be nice! Most often, the ones we like aren't nice enough! Let me just say, there’s no such thing as ‘too nice’ if a guy has a lot going on for himself; being the nice guy is a very strong attribute BUTTTTTTT stands painfully weak on its own.

& that’s all folks.

Beauty does not lie in the Booty!

Whether real or arguably fake (ahem, no names), the big booty mania just seems like it won't go away. Many women in the entertainment industry, most notably the video vixens, have used their astronomical behinds to build a career but now the exploitation of the female booty has reached an all time high, and if I see another naked arse photo on instagram, I think I will do Chris Brown back flips! I’m just so done seeing and hearing discussions on women’s fake arses! The huge fascination with it is quite bizarre, after all, the booty is there to sit on and sh*t from! Ok, ok, I guess it’s not really rocket science why men like the big booty but since this is not a Kama Sutra type of article, I will refrain from elaborating! Thanks to Sir Mix A Lot and almost every mainstream rap video ever made, the ‘I love big butts and I cannot lie’ trait happens to be a common male trait that just won’t budge.

Just to clear it up, I’m not a ‘big booty’ hater, in fact I fill my jeans very nicely if I should say so myself! I’m just irritated with the heavy media attention on a female’s behind and it is now said that demand for bum fat injections have increased; it has gone a tad bit too far don’t you think? Women internalise these images of 'beauty'; I don't particularly like being constantly told that I need double D's, a 23inch waist size and somehow, acquire a midget in my arse! I’m pretty sure many women were more than happy with their derrières until Nicki Minaj along with Kim K and their larger than life behinds came along!

These ‘hate your body and desire a body like this’ messages that are continuously being pushed to us are not easily ignored even for the strong minded, so God knows how its negatively influencing the young and vulnerable. Quite frankly, beauty does not lie in the booty so I would hate for any woman to not feel beautiful enough just because she is lacking in the booty department or any department for that matter. What makes a woman sexy is her confidence but before you can ooze confidence, you firstly need to be content with your body and the soul within it. At the end of the day a true man will never deny a good woman simply because she doesn’t have enough junk in the trunk. As desirable as it may be, we must understand that it only serves to make us more sexually desirable and nothing more; 'ass' is not short for asset ladies. So I suggest you tell all the media messages encouraging you to want a bigger arse…to kiss yo' arse!

Should children be colour conditioned?

Pink or blue? I imagine the question on an expectant parent's mind is whether their newborn baby will be a girl draped in pink or a boy dressed in blue. 'I think I would want the sex of my child to be a surprise when I'm pregnant', the response when I say this is often 'how could you not want to know' or 'but you won't be able to prepare for it properly'. For many, I gather that knowing the sex of the unborn baby matters because from the moment the child is born their gender will determine how they experience life and it will all begin with an innocent colour; pastel pink or baby blue.

It was recently my god-daughter's 6th birthday and at the age of 6, most girls have been sucked into the 'princess phase'. I'm not the biggest fan of princesses so words cannot describe my somewhat joy in hearing that she had asked for a skateboard, Ben 10 watch and a Spiderman toy for her birthday. Her mother was not so amused however, and in her attempt to defer me from buying her daughter something she had asked for she said, 'I don't want my daughter playing with boys' toys!'. I hadn't placed much thought into it before; why are children's toys so gender segregated?

Who says pink is just for girls? Surely by 'pinkifying' girls from the day they are born, we are conditioning children both male and female to associate anything pink with girls right? This seems innocent, however it's not the colour itself that is the issue here, the concern is the things the colour pink is associated with and how it is shaping the gender identity of girls. The pink bib reads 'Daddy's little princess' with hearts and flowers all over it while the blue bib reads 'Mummy's tough guy'. Then there's the toys they play with, girls toys being predominantly princesses and ponies, dolls and prams, kitchen sets, make up and dress up sets etc. In contrast, boys toys include action figures, superheroes, vehicles and construction sets; these help to develop their confidence, competitiveness and control whilst girls toys encourage beauty, romance and nurturing. Boys are told 'that's cool, go and show daddy what you made', while girls are told 'go and show daddy your pretty dress'. What happens in a child's development the more we continue to praise boys for their actions and girls for their looks?

From colour association, children will then move onto word and image associations. What opinions do we think little boys and girls will begin to form of themselves and of each other if words, images and toys associated with power, heroes, action, weapons etc are used with males whilst the associations with females are love, princess, barbies, kitchen sets etc. Children should be granted the choice to make decisions on their actual interests; if my god-daughter wants a skateboard, why should it be marketed as a 'boy's toy'? Why are we limiting children and their imaginations? What boys are interested in vs what girls are interested in are arguably acquired preferences rather than innate.

I believe these early developed gender associations that children make for themselves and each other play a significant part in their adulthood. I'm displeased with the colour conditioning on children; I see how women's plea for equality from their male counterparts may have unawarely began as a child with the colour pink, a colour funny enough once associated with masculinity. For as little girls, anything not pink was not for us to play with and unfortunately everything pink placed us into a narrow minded box of what girls are supposed to do...cook, push prams, dress up, look like barbie then like the princess films aspire to live happily ever after with prince charming. I'm sorry but I want to teach my daughter and son that girls can be pretty and powerful too and for this reason I sure hope my future daughter throws her pink toys out the pram!

The Great Escapes (The Friend Zone)

Some guys have been mercilessly locked up in the friend zone and yes...they are doing life. However, some guys are fortunate to have great escapes. Here are examples of the type of guys who end up in the friend zone but not forever.

• You both realised you liked each other at the wrong time and place

It is unfortunate when you realise your head over heels in like with someone...who already has someone. Sometimes the woman of interest is already in a relationship that she can't easily break away from; after all, it’s a big gamble for her to leave Mr ‘doing all the right things’ for potential Mr Right. So you both just remain friends, then finally all your voodoo and rituals pay off because her relationship snaps and so you fit yourself right in through the crack. Well, hopefully not literally! This is a true example of patience is a virtue and letting something you love go…sometimes it really does come back.

• You've stepped up your gaaame!

This one is for the late bloomers or the 'used to tell they friends I was ugly and wouldn't touch me, then I showed up in that dubbed out buggy, and then they got fussy and they don't remember that' guys - yeah them! They started making money and stepped up their swag to 100. They cleared the acne, the braces fixed up the crooked teeth, gave Harry Potter his glasses back and developed a cool talent along the way. Now they’ve successfully transitioned from ugly geek to panty dropper!

You really think Drake was getting chicks looking like this? When he was just Aubrey? I'm pretty sure he was being placed behind the friend zone bars left, right & centre. If the Take Care album is anything to go by, I’m pretty sure that Drake was the nice guy who finished last. But now with the fame, talent, millions to his name, he is a desirable man to many...I doubt those same women would dismiss him now for being ‘too nice’.

•She's reached mid-life crisis...your both still single so why not?!

You’ve got it quite bad; out of all the friend zone great escapes, well your escape just isn't great at all because you’re not even second best at this stage, not even. You’ve been in the friend zone for a good while and had to watch all those different guys come in & out of her life before she finally gave you a second look. It sucks really. But hey, the bright side is, the woman you truly love is all yours now and her bad experiences with men in the past means you'll be greatly appreciated.

Give Him A Chance!

Thought I'd repost this article I wrote a while ago...hehe.

Since the title is pretty self-explanatory, I’ll get straight to it. Here are five 'types' of guys that I think women (i.e. women twenty five and over and still single…*looks around* ...oh me!) need to show more love to.

1. Let's face it, the short guys tend to get overlooked (yes pun intended). Most women automatically dismiss a guy whose forehead is considerably lower than hers. The tall woman/short man combo doesn't work for everyone especially if it means sacrificing the baddest heels! Luckily for me, I’m only like 5’2 so I rarely even meet a guy whose shoulders are lower than mine but still, I know even short women often prefer the taller guys. This means tall girls want tall guys and short girls want tall guys, hmmm…basic economics tells me that there just isn’t enough supply to meet demand! So how about we give the vertically challenged, I mean short guys a chance. You may also find that they tend to be more driven and/or have great personalities; maybe traits they were forced to develop in order to compete with their taller counterparts? Maybe. Basically, just because they fall short in height, doesn't mean they fall short in everything else *wink wink*.

2. I remember I always used to say I'd never hook up with a guy I met in a club, then realised it was silly to say I'd never hook up with a guy I met in a club because in order for me to meet him in a club...well my arse would have to be boogying in the club too! Truth is I know I’m not half bad so it would be ignorant to think he isn’t a decent guy just because he’s in the club too; he could be there celebrating his friend’s birthday, doesn’t mean he’s a regular there. I know the club doesn't quite make the ideal scene to meet your ideal man, but to be fair, whether a guy approaches you on the streets, in a supermarket, in a library, art gallery, at a wedding or that Sunday night soca rave you sneak to...let's face it, the reasons will be the same – he was attracted to your appearance. You really think he is approaching you for your mind or a personality he doesn’t know yet? Girl, sitcho arse down!

3. What if you have no respect for his profession? Hmm…by all means, a woman wants a 'successful' man. Now everyone has their own measures of success but I think most women can agree that the man slouching on the sofa relying on jobseekers allowance doesn't quite measure up. There are unfortunately, some professions that people just have no respect for; for example, a friend was telling me about a guy she was once dating but just couldn't take him seriously because of what he did for a living which was playing online polka - she just couldn't respect that! Generally, women want a man with 1. 'a' job 2. a 'good decent' job and 3. preferably a REAL job! Obviously age is a factor when it comes to a guy's profession because him working as a shop floor assistant in a toy store was cute in college but him still working as a shop floor assistant in a toy store now aged 35 is not so cute and most importantly makes you question his drive and ambition (or lack of). So why give the man with the disrespected profession a chance? Well because you don't know the man he’ll become; just because you don’t like where he is now, doesn’t mean you won’t love the man he turns out to be in the future. Find out what he’s about first, he could well be a hard working man with a plan and goals, and maybe this job is just a means to an end for now.

4. I know I said baby daddy’s were one of my biggest turn offs because the thought of him sharing something as precious as a child with another woman kinda sucks…well nothing’s changed, it still sucks! However, if he’s doing everything right, are you really going to let someone who is your perfect match slip away just because he happens to already have a child? Look, it would be much more alarming if he had a child that he wasn’t claiming! Besides, a man with a child may have a certain level maturity that one without has not acquired. If he doesn’t come with the baby mama drama then I say give him a shot and if things go well prep yourself up for some step-monster, I mean step-mother duties.


5. Last but by all means not least, let’s hear out the mature younger dude. Notice I said ‘mature’. I actually know of some guys who got married by the age of 21with NO child involved, they were just ready to settle down early (and no they didn’t have a gun to their heads, I already asked that question). Don’t automatically write him off as irresponsible and immature just because he’s younger. I mean, obviously there is a paedophilia territory that you just don’t cross, just don’t! Overall, older women/younger men relationships can work out...was going to use Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher as an example but can't now, but hey with a MASSIVE age gap of 23 years, I'm impressed that they even maintained a marriage for 6 years. I'll have to settle with the Careys as an example -----and after marriage and two babies in the carriage, they still appear to be going strong. So yeah, don’t go cradle snatching all at once now ladies!

Ugh. Are you for real?!

Ok so, remember that guy or girl from your past who you just couldn't get enough of? The attraction was there, the banter was there, and you both just got on ridiculously well. However, despite having all the ingredients to form a solid relationship, for some unknown reason to you s/he just didn't want to be with you on a serious level. You ended up in this strange realm where you're not quite in the friend zone but also not cutting it to the girlfriend/boyfriend status. So one day it finally hits home that this make-believe relationship you have with them in your head has got to stop because its not real. Usually by this point you have already put a lot of emotional investment into this 'friend-lationship' and so the realisation of being rejected kinda hurts. In fact, it really hurts but we're just going to play it cool and not show it; deep down inside though the bitterness is reaaal. I mean, all we can think about is 'how dare you not want to be with ME?! I'm perfect for you; who else is going to love you from your receding hairline down to the corns on your feet?! You really think you can do better than ME??'. There's this great anticipation to see the 'better you' he or she gets into a relationship with since they annoyingly think they can do better. Boi, this new person better be the ish. Then the day comes when you finally see the 'better you'. Wait a min. You didn't want to get with me but you got with this crispy rice cake...

Are you for real?! Ugh.

Why I stan for Beyoncé

Girls love Beyoncé. Well I sure do! Her show in London was awesome. After fully regaining my voice, I can proudly say that I've reached stan status. Let me commence with my Beyoncé appreciation:

She's not just another manufactured pop star who looks good but lacks talent (ahem, no names). I like it when pretty girls don't have the 'pretty girl syndrome' where they just depend solely on their good looks to get them by. Beyoncé is not one to hold herself back in the name of vanity; have you seen how hard she performs? She turns from beauty into a beast on stage...literally! She looks like she's about to give someone the biggest smack down of their life!

They call her Queen Bey because she's at the top of her game and yes she's 'snatching wigs'! Though its fair to say her music isn't on the same playing field as an MJ record, no one cares because she just slays every single stage she steps foot on! I mean, my sister who used to stan hard for Rihanna has never bought an album before (not even Rihanna's), yet was able to reach for her purse to make that purchase on Beyoncé's album and was up 7am waiting to get her Mrs Carter Show ticket...Beyoncé did that! 

From Queen Bey to King Bey. She is her own boss with a great team behind her and oh yeah, shit loads of money! It is said that she made $200 million from her Mrs Carter show which ended last month - bawse! In a world where there are women who use men as financial plans, I rate Beyoncé for holding it down on her own. She has also cleverly managed to take full control of her personal brand and how she wants us to perceive her. Her work ethic is crazy and despite all her success, she still has so much drive and hunger for more. This woman just won't sit her booty shaking self down!

Speaking of sitting down, when she decided to embark on a massive world tour...had Blu Ivy's umbilical cord even been cut yet?! To top that, she was secretly recording songs along with shooting music videos then BANG! out of nowhere she drops a surprise album on us...*takes a minute of silence*. Then what? She tours again that's what. She made having a baby look so easy; she gave birth then got back to business...and she meant business. This woman truly is a beast.

She's one half of a 'power couple'. Just in case her talent, accomplishments and wealth wasn't something to be envious of, she marries a man who matches her success status. Though its debatable whether or not they are actually happy in love together, she's married with child and that's what women are told to aspire for right?? Well she's got that checked off.

Her work-life balance is...unfair! As much as she works hard (doing something she loves), she also gets to live her life and quite frankly, has enough money not to work! Can we also take a quick moment to discuss the fact that she doesn't appear to have many friends? All her candid photos that surface on the net are of her with her team or family. When do you see her snapped with celeb 'friends' or caught given shout outs to celeb 'besties'? She's not on a popularity hype and I like that.

Above all, the reason why I stan hard for Beyonce is because she actually seems like a nice person, and if she's not then this further shows how well she's orchestrating her image. Bow down!

Freak Shows

Exhibited in London Piccadilly Circus as a ‘freak show’ by Europeans who were highly intrigued with her voluptuous figure, I was deeply saddened by the story of Sara Baartman, an enslaved South African woman. Fascinated with her breasts, hips, arse and lips, which were gigantic by Eurocentric standards, she was ridiculed and paraded as a ‘freak’ and commanded to gyrate like a wild beast. Given the stage name ‘Hottentot Venus’, she was placed on a stage, naked and bare, where the Europeans paid to stare. She soon died at a youthful age of 25.

As I read her story, I was not only frustrated by the way the body of an African woman was degraded, but also because this happened in the early 1800s and two centuries later I fail to see any change. Black women in the entertainment industry receive more recognition for their larger than life curves rather than their talent; there is this senseless fascination with the big booty. The media sexually objectifies women in general but I feel as though for black women there is a lack of balance; there are more oversexed half naked type images of black women shoved in our faces in comparison to Oprah type images. Without the balance, it’s very easy for black women to fall into the trap of basing their desirability on the size of their behinds instead of what’s inside their minds. It’s as though our ‘ass’ has become our biggest asset. We stage name ourselves now with so-called ‘alter egos’ and proudly gyrate in music videos. I can’t even go onto Instagram without seeing freak shows on my news feed, young women exhibiting their own bodies. I wish more black men and women knew and empathized with the story of Sara Baartman, an enslaved young African woman who was sexually exploited in a ‘human zoo’ for fortune and fame because the only thing that has changed is that we now happily sexually exploit ourselves.



"All I want for my birthday is a big booty hoe" - 2Chainz


“Most often attention was not focused on the complete black female on display…They are to not look at her as a whole human being. They are to notice only certain parts.” -Bell Hooks, Black Looks